Words, and words, and words

“Writer’s never feel legit.”
… But they do it anyway. In a recent article on makealiving.com, I couldn’t help but feel like the words were calling out to me. Courage, when it comes to my writing, is the thing I lack most; courage to put myself out there, courage to take a leap of faith. But it is the determination that keeps me going. You can never teach a person to write, they can only be shaped and influenced by teachers and other authors. I cannot explain how much my writing has morphed through the years as I was exposed to different pieces of literature. Once I found an author that I connected to, I picked apart my favorite pieces of their writing and combined it into mine. What I was left with was very similar to different colors of Play-Doh that were mushed into one with no definitive color. From there I would mold these fragments until they became one continuous piece; I gave my voice a physical place on the page.

“Stop typing so loud, you’re hurting my ears.”
My fingers pounded relentlessly on the keyboard of my laptop, a stony expression on my face as I stared intently at the white screen. Black letters began to cover all the blank spaces as my typing became faster. Occasionally, there was a sudden halt to the noise– a few stolen seconds where I could collect my next thoughts and order them into logical sentences to be written down. Writing hasn’t been something that has come naturally to me lately– the creative juices that usually occupy my mind have been sucked out of me by the world of Academia. Frequently I find myself questioning whether I am wasting my time. Perhaps there is another path to success that I have overlooked. The harsh reality of life always dawns on me the same way, nothing is guaranteed.
Former High School peers that were so set on their paths have taken completely different turns. Unfortunately, or fortunately, I have been a part of this group as well. Like many of my former classmates, I am just trying to find myself and what I want to spend the rest of my life doing. After all, “Your life could be turned into a movie one day, don’t let it go straight to DVD.”

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